Lapcamvid Sabnibgum is a god.

It takes the form of a blubbery, astonishing wasp.

Lapcamvid Sabnibgum created everything that exists eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Lapcamvid Sabnibgum, it will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Lapcamvid Sabnibgum, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Lapcamvid Sabnibgum's most sacred site is Alyki in Greece.

Lapcamvid Sabnibgum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant indigo sculpture of Lapcamvid Sabnibgum in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

4. Do not contemplate thermodynamics during the night.

5. Always pray immersed in water.