Dobyimbiss is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, temperamental squirrel.

Dobyimbiss created viruses four billion years ago.

If you believe in Dobyimbiss, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Dobyimbiss, he will turn you into a dog.

Dobyimbiss' most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Dobyimbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never write about quantum field theory.

3. Never point your chest toward the south during prayer.

4. Never allow monkeys to sleep beneath your roof.

5. Hide if five horses approach from the north.