Arnjinzenyatt is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, dishonest newt.

Arnjinzenyatt created Asia three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Arnjinzenyatt, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Arnjinzenyatt, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Arnjinzenyatt's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Arnjinzenyatt's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if seven hamsters approach from the east.

2. Never talk about comets.

3. Do not place peanuts upon stone.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. Always keep your back turned to the north at sunset.