Tanflisxem is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, staggering camel.

Tanflisxem created Africa eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Tanflisxem, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Tanflisxem, it will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Tanflisxem's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Tanflisxem's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove hats before entering holy places.

2. Never approach mountains carrying wood.

3. Never touch blood while blessed.

4. Never sprint in the presence of mites.

5. Never speak at dusk.