Gemominyak is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, narcissistic turtle.

Gemominyak created dark energy eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gemominyak, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Gemominyak, it will strike you with lightening.

Gemominyak's most sacred site is Omaweneno in Botswana.

Gemominyak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hurt monkeys.

2. Paint representations of nebulae on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of platinum.

5. Never talk about horizontal gene transfer.