Nartlibgepbem is a god.

He takes the form of a heavy, witty chinchilla.

Nartlibgepbem created the planet Venus three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nartlibgepbem, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Nartlibgepbem, he will not care.

Nartlibgepbem's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Nartlibgepbem's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if six voles approach from the north.

2. Paint representations of black holes on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Feed all hungry geese.

4. Always store rice above ground.

5. Do not speak about parsnips.