Quillapkad Fidortfig is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely heavy, witless ant.

Quillapkad Fidortfig created dark energy four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Quillapkad Fidortfig, it will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Quillapkad Fidortfig, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Quillapkad Fidortfig's most sacred site is Hej in Sweden.

Quillapkad Fidortfig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion tools from tin.

2. You must pray to Quillapkad Fidortfig five times a day.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Never eat grapes on holy days.

5. Do not eat spinach.