Labgarfag is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, passionate zebra.

Labgarfag created the Virgo Supercluster five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Labgarfag, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Labgarfag, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Labgarfag's most sacred site is Gorslas in Wales.

Labgarfag's Holy Commandments

1. Never proclaim while facing west.

2. Never think ill of sick cats.

3. Walk at least six thousand metres per day.

4. Never look at comets.

5. Always help porpoises in need.