Nulgadcin is a god.

He takes the form of a chunky, unthoughtful dryad.

Nulgadcin created tapeworms three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nulgadcin, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Nulgadcin, he will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Nulgadcin's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Nulgadcin's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat nuts on holy days.

2. Hide if three mice approach from the south.

3. Always wear orange.

4. Run away from black aardvarks, for they are unholy.

5. Never stain your feet with violet.