Funtoflagcud is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, happy dolphin.

Funtoflagcud created the Whirlpool Galaxy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Funtoflagcud, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Funtoflagcud, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Funtoflagcud's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Funtoflagcud's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of titanium.

5. Do not place corn upon stone.