Libpigcab is a god.

He takes the form of a giant, moody scorpion.

Libpigcab created humankind six billion years ago.

If you believe in Libpigcab, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Libpigcab, he will turn you into a dog.

Libpigcab's most sacred site is Kottucherry in India.

Libpigcab's Holy Commandments

1. Do not place limes upon stone.

2. Do not hurt mites.

3. Never think about quantum mechanics near tapirs while wearing magenta tights and balancing eight carbon spheres on your legs.

4. Always make sure there are no tortoises in a room before entering it.

5. Do not speak sacred words in winter.