Cublagrill Mipgessrak is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, temperamental squid.

Cublagrill Mipgessrak created the world eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Cublagrill Mipgessrak, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Cublagrill Mipgessrak, she will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Cublagrill Mipgessrak's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Cublagrill Mipgessrak's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine platinum sculptures of Cublagrill Mipgessrak on top of important buildings.

2. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.

3. Always wash your legs before prayer.

4. Do not name children after mice.

5. Do not listen to music.