Nuttrotpad is a god.

He takes the form of a planet-sized, wise swallow.

Nuttrotpad created the planet Earth five billion years ago.

If you believe in Nuttrotpad, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nuttrotpad, he will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Nuttrotpad's most sacred site is Outchimedu in India.

Nuttrotpad's Holy Commandments

1. Always remove hats before entering holy places.

2. Never record signs.

3. Do not prepare beans while filled with anger.

4. Pray towards the south.

5. Do not shave your feet.