Dobzigteen is a god.

She takes the form of a plump, fast zebra.

Dobzigteen created an atom three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dobzigteen, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dobzigteen, she will make you grow a tail.

Dobzigteen's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dobzigteen's Holy Commandments

1. Never adorn your back with orange markings.

2. Always remove hats before entering holy places.

3. Never run near birds.

4. Never think about dark matter near dolphins while wearing turquoise tights and balancing three iron spheres on your arms.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.