Tenvilyik is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, irritating hyena.

Tenvilyik created everything that exists three million years ago.

If you believe in Tenvilyik, it will approve.

If you do not believe in Tenvilyik, it will turn you into a sheep.

Tenvilyik's most sacred site is Aimala in Finland.

Tenvilyik's Holy Commandments

1. Fast once a month.

2. Do not covet oxen.

3. Never fashion tools from clay.

4. Learn six new languages a year.

5. Never write about electromagnetism.