Tarpsidcunmis is a god.

She takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, boastful octopus.

Tarpsidcunmis created an up quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Tarpsidcunmis, she will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Tarpsidcunmis, she will attempt to scare you with lightening.

Tarpsidcunmis' most sacred site is Morella in Spain.

Tarpsidcunmis' Holy Commandments

1. Always treat frogs with great respect.

2. Always make sure there are no goats in a room before entering it.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Always wash your legs before prayer.

5. Retreat if seven great tits approach from the north.