Ratbaggamwon is a god.

It takes the form of a very long, prudent manatee.

Ratbaggamwon created vertebrates seven million years ago.

If you believe in Ratbaggamwon, it will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Ratbaggamwon, it will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Ratbaggamwon's most sacred site is Zhelaizhai in China.

Ratbaggamwon's Holy Commandments

1. Never carve symbols of stars into wood.

2. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Ratbaggamwon in the centre of the settlement.

3. Always remove shorts before touching lead.

4. Never write about thermodynamics.

5. Never mix lentils with blood.