Pangjatcumhivced is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, blissful goblin.

Pangjatcumhivced created oxygen two thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pangjatcumhivced, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Pangjatcumhivced, she will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Pangjatcumhivced's most sacred site is Kirumampakkam in India.

Pangjatcumhivced's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

2. Never talk about archaea.

3. Always store nuts above ground.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Always count to five before sleeping.