Kintailnutt is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, generous jellyfish.

Kintailnutt created Mount Everest eight million years ago.

If you believe in Kintailnutt, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Kintailnutt, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Kintailnutt's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Kintailnutt's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan coats on sacred days.

2. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.

3. Do not cook food in pots.

4. Never speak at midnight.

5. Do not name children after squirrels.