Febmet is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, moody newt.

Febmet created tapeworms two years ago.

If you believe in Febmet, she will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Febmet, she will manifest in front of you.

Febmet's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Febmet's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear plain shorts during rituals.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never wear hats.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Never talk about planets.