Vangamgum is a god.

She takes the form of a rotund, egotistical dryad.

Vangamgum created a bottom quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Vangamgum, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Vangamgum, she will ignore you.

Vangamgum's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Vangamgum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat bananas.

2. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

3. Always face the south before speaking sacred words.

4. Never prepare oranges during autumn.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.