Gigbonkflow is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, impressive monkey.

Gigbonkflow created a top quark four million years ago.

If you believe in Gigbonkflow, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Gigbonkflow, she will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Gigbonkflow's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Gigbonkflow's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak at midday.

2. Do not resist balance.

3. Do not laugh in public.

4. Never mix pineapples with oil.

5. Never write about thermodynamics.