Nurlbudwat is a god.

She takes the form of a seven hundred metre long, impressive hyena.

Nurlbudwat created Europe nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbudwat, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nurlbudwat, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Nurlbudwat's most sacred site is Oitti in Finland.

Nurlbudwat's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed cherries to doves while wearing trousers.

2. Never leap in holy places.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Never feed parsnips to sharks while wearing pink kilts.