Flangomtif is a god.

It takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, awesome skunk.

Flangomtif created silver seven million years ago.

If you believe in Flangomtif, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Flangomtif, it will turn you into a plant.

Flangomtif's most sacred site is Crugybar in Wales.

Flangomtif's Holy Commandments

1. Never allow ducks to sleep beneath your roof.

2. Never travel toward the west during summer.

3. Erect a giant carbon sculpture of Flangomtif in the centre of the settlement.

4. Show mercy to disobedient children.

5. Pray only in shadows.