Hitkarlist is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, witless troll.

Hitkarlist created energy six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hitkarlist, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Hitkarlist, she will turn you into a slug.

Hitkarlist's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Hitkarlist's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Always maintain purity during days of mourning.

3. Always wash your arms before prayer.

4. Never write about dwarf planets.

5. Always help snakes.