Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin is a god.

It takes the form of a very fat, able rhinoceros.

Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin created Africa seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin, it will try to impress you with trees.

Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin's most sacred site is Maijoma in Mexico.

Honpodgar Fossfetkab Tamvonhin's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about snails.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate dogs.

3. Do not prepare tomatoes while wearing jumpers.

4. Do not speak sacred words in summer.

5. Always act with purity.