Gomxenhamdonzod is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, resourceful gnu.

Gomxenhamdonzod created Africa seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gomxenhamdonzod, she will not care.

If you do not believe in Gomxenhamdonzod, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Gomxenhamdonzod's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Gomxenhamdonzod's Holy Commandments

1. Always share lemons with strangers, but never with dolphins.

2. Never tolerate cries in holy places.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never skip near pigs.

5. Always wear plain scarves during rituals.