Fatfobren is a god.

He takes the form of a very fat, omniscient centaur.

Fatfobren created gold seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fatfobren, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Fatfobren, he will destroy your home planet.

Fatfobren's most sacred site is Kauvatsa in Finland.

Fatfobren's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear red.

2. Always obey Fatfobren's priests.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Do not step barefoot upon black earth.

5. Do not shave your head.