Fedguparfmon is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, idiotic centipede.

Fedguparfmon created the planet Earth four years ago.

If you believe in Fedguparfmon, she will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Fedguparfmon, she will send two she bears to sort you out.

Fedguparfmon's most sacred site is Khwee in Botswana.

Fedguparfmon's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick seals.

2. Learn five new languages a year.

3. Do not speak about figs.

4. Never speak the names of moons aloud.

5. Do not count beyond three during ceremonies.