Besslaglarn is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, confident donkey.

Besslaglarn created Europe three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Besslaglarn, it will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Besslaglarn, it will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Besslaglarn's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Besslaglarn's Holy Commandments

1. Besslaglarn loves shrews, so they must be respected.

2. Never adorn your head with black markings.

3. Never wear scarves.

4. You must love Besslaglarn.

5. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.