Kadlatnel Banpodgep is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, idiotic cyclops-rhinoceros-snail.

Kadlatnel Banpodgep created humanity two billion years ago.

If you believe in Kadlatnel Banpodgep, it will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Kadlatnel Banpodgep, it will throw large rocks at you.

Kadlatnel Banpodgep's most sacred site is Xtul in Mexico.

Kadlatnel Banpodgep's Holy Commandments

1. Never speak the names of planets aloud.

2. Always wear yellow.

3. Never wear boots.

4. Always maintain obedience during days of mourning.

5. Hide from brown moths for they are unholy.