Lagmotbim Kabdubcun is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, tranquil salamander.

Lagmotbim Kabdubcun created time and space six million years ago.

If you believe in Lagmotbim Kabdubcun, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Lagmotbim Kabdubcun, she will strike you with lightening.

Lagmotbim Kabdubcun's most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Lagmotbim Kabdubcun's Holy Commandments

1. Never fashion tools from wood.

2. Do not record names concerning comets.

3. Remain kneeling during prayer.

4. Never play with disobedient children.

5. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Lagmotbim Kabdubcun.