Fetdontan is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly fat, weak swallow.

Fetdontan created the world nine million years ago.

If you believe in Fetdontan, she will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fetdontan, she will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Fetdontan's most sacred site is Romlund in Denmark.

Fetdontan's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if five dolphins approach from the west.

2. Do not step barefoot upon mauve earth.

3. Always wear pink.

4. Do not keep four nematodes in a large pit.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.