Fubjamvilzog is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, charitable seal.

Fubjamvilzog created the planet Mars nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Fubjamvilzog, it will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Fubjamvilzog, it will turn you into a slug.

Fubjamvilzog's most sacred site is Phepheng in Botswana.

Fubjamvilzog's Holy Commandments

1. Never pray while filled with fear.

2. Do not fashion models of living things.

3. Do not contemplate dark matter during the night.

4. Always help sick dogs.

5. Always remove shirts before entering holy places.