Gatnelyar is a god.

He takes the form of a fat, idiotic narwhal.

Gatnelyar created the Whirlpool Galaxy three million years ago.

If you believe in Gatnelyar, he will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Gatnelyar, he will jump up and down fuming with anger.

Gatnelyar's most sacred site is Trujillo in Spain.

Gatnelyar's Holy Commandments

1. Always share bread with strangers, but never with voles.

2. Do not fashion sacred items from bone.

3. Always act with obedience when addressing strangers.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not kill mites.