Ladstafsis is a god.

He takes the form of a four thousand metre long, humorless turtle.

Ladstafsis created the Tadpole Galaxy three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ladstafsis, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Ladstafsis, he will make you grow a tail.

Ladstafsis' most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Ladstafsis' Holy Commandments

1. Never eat carrots.

2. Never speak at dawn.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. You must love Ladstafsis.

5. Do not drink water in black rooms.