Stangemyar is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, generous bird.

Stangemyar created water four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stangemyar, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stangemyar, it will curse you and those you beget for seventy quadrillion years.

Stangemyar's most sacred site is Katteri in India.

Stangemyar's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

2. Do not prepare apples while wearing rings.

3. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Stangemyar on top of all buildings.

4. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

5. Do not wear black clothing.