Hingesstam is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, all-knowing seal.

Hingesstam created the Large Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Hingesstam, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Hingesstam, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Hingesstam's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Hingesstam's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Do not take Hingesstam's name in vain.

3. Never leap near ducks.

4. Never speak at dusk.

5. Do not step barefoot upon pink earth.