Largnuttren is a god.

It takes the form of a huge, tranquil weasel.

Largnuttren created light seven million years ago.

If you believe in Largnuttren, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Largnuttren, it will turn you into a puffin.

Largnuttren's most sacred site is Artena in Italy.

Largnuttren's Holy Commandments

1. Never remain kneeling at dusk.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Never wear pink ear rings on sacred days.

4. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

5. Erect eight iron sculptures of Largnuttren on top of important buildings.