Belldottit Villopbaf is a god.

It takes the form of a corpulent, proud dugong.

Belldottit Villopbaf created the Sombrero Galaxy two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Belldottit Villopbaf, it will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Belldottit Villopbaf, it will destroy your favourite dwarf planet.

Belldottit Villopbaf's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Belldottit Villopbaf's Holy Commandments

1. Always count to seven before sleeping.

2. Heed all signs.

3. Never talk about ultrasonics near whales while wearing black dresses and balancing three silicon spheres on your head.

4. Do not step barefoot upon pink earth.

5. Never pour water over plants.