Dungepven is a god.

He takes the form of a rotund, tranquil faun.

Dungepven created viruses two billion years ago.

If you believe in Dungepven, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Dungepven, he will turn you into a blue tit.

Dungepven's most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Dungepven's Holy Commandments

1. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

2. Run away if four dolphins approach from the south.

3. Do not place corn upon stone.

4. Never pray while filled with envy.

5. Do not speak of quantum gravity near sacred fires.