Nurlbummum is a god.

He takes the form of a massive, annoying newt.

Nurlbummum created the Black Eye Galaxy three quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Nurlbummum, he will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Nurlbummum, he will curse you and those you beget for twenty six billion years.

Nurlbummum's most sacred site is Dzhanka in Bulgaria.

Nurlbummum's Holy Commandments

1. Always maintain purity during days of mourning.

2. Never think ill of sick nematodes.

3. Never cross forests at dawn.

4. Do not count beyond five during ceremonies.

5. Never record numbers.