Rilcitgon is a god.

It takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, loving cow.

Rilcitgon created dark energy three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Rilcitgon, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Rilcitgon, it will laugh at you.

Rilcitgon's most sacred site is Minnigaff in Scotland.

Rilcitgon's Holy Commandments

1. Do not skip at mountains.

2. Do not cook food in pots.

3. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near dolphins while wearing brown jumpers.

4. Never sprint near hamsters.

5. Never wear coats.