Stragbepvad is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, unjust seal.

Stragbepvad created the Andromeda Galaxy three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Stragbepvad, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Stragbepvad, she will throw large rocks at you.

Stragbepvad's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Stragbepvad's Holy Commandments

1. Do not fashion models of living things.

2. Never speak at midday.

3. Never bounce in the presence of rats.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Stragbepvad.

5. Always take life seriously.