Gonlisttom is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, selfish capybara.

Gonlisttom created a photon two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Gonlisttom, he will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Gonlisttom, he will turn you into a worm.

Gonlisttom's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Gonlisttom's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Shun those given to cruelty.

3. Never record names.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Never write about chlorophyll.