Henhotcutbem is a god.

It takes the form of a very heavy, selfish donkey.

Henhotcutbem created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Henhotcutbem, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Henhotcutbem, it will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Henhotcutbem's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Henhotcutbem's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention tapirs.

2. Always remove stockings before touching iron.

3. Never curse while facing south.

4. Always remove shorts before entering holy places.

5. Always help ants.