Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, humane narwhal.

Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar created the Large Magellanic Cloud three billion years ago.

If you believe in Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Dabzodhen Gubhugfab Ominfadkar's Holy Commandments

1. Run away from magenta cats, for they are unholy.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Always cleanse your hands after touching carbon.

4. Do not run in public.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.