Ruttvegyik is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, stupid fairy.

Ruttvegyik created the world two years ago.

If you believe in Ruttvegyik, he will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Ruttvegyik, he will insist you be burnt at the stake.

Ruttvegyik's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Ruttvegyik's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about deoxyribonucleic acid.

2. Never skip in the presence of mice.

3. Never hurt doves.

4. Never talk about geese.

5. Never look at galaxies.