Futzimtab is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, duplicitous dryad.

Futzimtab created a quark seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Futzimtab, it will not care.

If you do not believe in Futzimtab, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Futzimtab's most sacred site is Troqueer in Scotland.

Futzimtab's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about galaxies.

2. Always look after injured tortoises.

3. Never talk about moons.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Always help sick geese.