Talbogzagmid is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, unthoughtful bat.

Talbogzagmid created the planet Mars twelve years ago.

If you believe in Talbogzagmid, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Talbogzagmid, it will attempt to scare you with floods.

Talbogzagmid's most sacred site is Brancion in France.

Talbogzagmid's Holy Commandments

1. Do not prepare nuts while wearing dresses.

2. You must pray to Talbogzagmid eight times a day.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never pour water over plants.

5. Always take life seriously.